Jargon

This time we’ll look at advertising copy. The following are snippets taken from a flyer for airforce® Nutrisoda®, the “nutrient enhanced soda.” The soda has different “flavors,” which are actually different sodas designed to improve different aspects of a New Age person’s lifestyle, such as “calm” or “energize.” As it says in small print, all statements on this flyer have “not been evaluated by the food and drug administration [and] . . . are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.”

  • FLEX: black cherry + apple . . . Helps lubricate, repair and restore active joints for improved movement and flexibility.
  • FOCUS: mango + peach . . . Because golf is 90% mental and 10% psychological . . . Scientifically formulated with the right nutrients to help you stay alert and naturally energized with increased concentration when you have to perform at your mental peak. Focus Nutrisoda® doesn’t just taste good, it is good.
  • SLENDER: pink grapefruit + guava . . . Facilitates weight management with ingredients that may speed up the body’s metabolism, reduce conversion of carbohydrates to fat & suppress appetite.

Source: Flyer found in trash can at corner of 27th Street and Hennepin Avenue, Minneapolis, Minnesota.

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