The O.C. — Oh, No!

I enjoy watching TV.

Sure, I’ve gone through stages of TV-watching: a three-hour-a-day habit, a strict one show per day limit, and a firm denial of any watching whatsoever. I’m not here to make any judgments about how much TV one should watch. At this point of my life, I feel I’ve earned the right to decide for myself how much TV I should watch. And just as I generally eat healthy foods but every now and then munch on a few Cheetos, I generally watch quality shows, but occasionally watch the Cheetos of the TV world — Fox’s The O.C.

The O.C. started out just fine, for the type of show it was — a guy from the wrong side of the tracks somehow gets caught up in the lives of a wealthier family and falls for a wealthy girl. Sounds like a great start for a teen dramedy, right? It was everything I expected it to be. The hunky poor guy attends ritzy parties, hangs out with a nerdy-yet-cute school outcast, and gets in fights with the school’s water polo team.

In my opinion, part of the glory of this type of show is that we all have sort of an inkling about what should happen. The hunky guy will of course get together with the beautiful rich girl. The nerdy-yet-cute guy will hunger for the love of a popular girl, but never receive it (until possibly the end of the series). The bully will continue to be the nemesis of the hunky guy. Of course.

That’s why I was a bit taken aback, beginning with the last part of the first season. OK, so the hunky guy and beautiful girl are having problems — but they’ll patch it up. Wait a minute, the nerdy-yet-cute guy gets together with the popular girl? Everyone becomes friends, even the bully? At first it was bewildering, but then I got used to the break from the usual TV storylines. How exciting! No one knew what would happen next!

Then it got to be too much for me. The stories got more and more outlandish. A prime example of this is the life of Marissa Cooper. In less than three years, this teen’s parents have gotten a divorce and then almost re-married; her sister has been sent to a boarding school and briefly returned to date, then attend the funeral of a local boy; her mother has had a brief affair with Marissa’s ex-boyfriend, then married a rich old man who later dies; and her father has been the focus of an FBI investigation, lost most of the money entrusted to him by his clients, and moved away. That doesn’t even count what Marissa herself has been up to: experiencing a drug overdose in Tijuana, nearly being institutionalized by her mom, battling an alcohol problem, dating a woman from the local music scene, and shooting her boyfriend’s brother. She was also the chairman of the high school’s activities committee. Personally, just experiencing one of these events would be plenty for me to deal with, including being on an activities committee. (If you’ve never seen the show, believe it or not, these things did all happen. Also, thanks for reading this far into the article!)

The problem isn’t that outrageous events occur on the show. On a show like this, crazy antics are demanded. But it’s gone past TV-believable to just plain ridiculousness. Does something earth-shattering have to happen every episode? Whatever happened to an episode about hoping a girl would go out with you, or accidentally having two dates at the same place and same time, or getting locked in a storage room with someone you say you hate but have a lot of sexual tension with? When the glory of mundane events gets overlooked, outrageous events become boring. That’s what’s happened here.

Along with the problem of preposterous storylines, the revolving door of characters is also moving far too quickly. In a show that’s only a few seasons old, there are a surprising number of characters that have walked onto the show only to be written out again a few episodes later. If my children, years in the future, watch a few episodes from the third season, then watch an episode from the first season, it’s likely that there would be at least two characters they’d never seen before. And they probably wouldn’t know what’s going on in the plot.

It’s also likely that if people watch the show ten years from now, it’ll seem extremely dated. For one thing, the writers of the show have really packed in a lot of references and “cool” teen slang. Characters don’t listen to CD players, they listen to iPods. They go to Modest Mouse shows. They use “MapQuest” as a verb. I understand that it’s an attempt to be hip, and that’s what annoys me. It’s like the commercials for Bailey’s Irish Cream where groups of young people attend parties where they only serve Bailey’s. I get it — we’re supposed to think they’re really hip and thus want to drink their brand of booze. But really it has the opposite effect on me. I’m not going to turn up my nose if someone gives me a bottle of Bailey’s, but I’m not going to make a beeline to the Bailey’s when I’m at the liquor store. In the same way, I’m not fooled by The O.C.’s slang.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate the show. I’m a bit annoyed with it at times, but obviously I’ve continued watching it. There are some good qualities: there are great shots of the beach that are nice to see now that it’s the middle of the winter; I like a few of the characters; and although I sometimes have to remind myself about the whole “suspension of disbelief” thing, it’s not a bad mental getaway. Especially while eating Cheetos.

Melinda Cameron used to watch Saved by the Bell.

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